(Barry, Bafflingly Benificent St. Bernard).
(Not like that Bastard, Beethoven).


...and so on.

Note how I am NOT on this list. (Not that I care-- dorks).

To write these ditties, she has hogged the computer, researching asinine things like the following:

--taxidermy
--Camille Saint-Saens
--methods of slaughtering poultry
--simple physics
--properties of homeostasis (blood clotting)
--hypothermia

...And they make fun of me for sleeping in a drawer all day.